Finding rest in a busy world

“Stop and smell the roses.” This advice has been given in sayings and songs for decades. Holy books have a version of this. The Hebrew Bible (Christian Old Testament) says, “Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). My seventh-grade English teacher, Mrs. Whittlesey, put this sentiment in a more memorable and poetic form: “Inch by inch, life is a cinch; but yard by yard, life is hard.”

The main idea is that we are built with a need to stop, rest and reflect. People of faith call this “sabbath,” which involves an entire day set aside to stop and rest. We all know that this concept is easier to write about and talk about than it is to accomplish. We live in a busy, “get it done now” world, where it is much easier to work oneself to death than it is to pause and actually enjoy life.

It is no wonder that virtually all the world’s religions include commandments or at least opportunities to rest. According to the Bible, even God took a day off (see the creation account in Genesis 1-3). Of course, God’s day off was not out of physical necessity, but out of example. It’s as if God says, “If I take a day off without physically needing one, you certainly should!”

Very few of us are experts on resting. Most often we rest out of sheer necessity: We work ourselves so hard that we collapse, only to arise from a fitful sleep and start our busyness all over again. Researchers and physicians have demonstrated the results of this vicious cycle. We are a nation of depressed, stressed, anxious and disconnected people. Even people of faith — including members of clergy — are suffering burnout at record rates.

The pandemic certainly hasn’t helped matters, but it has only served to highlight certain trends that were already in place. We are, in the words of author Diane Fassel’s book written 20 years ago, “Working Ourselves to Death.”

We cannot simply stop working, of course. But, we can find ways to take intentional time to rest. The key is intentionality. Experts say that building time into our day — even writing it on our calendars — is a good way to start.

Secondly, we must move away from the guilt of taking time off. As one counselor friend of mine said to me, “Self-care is not selfish.” There is a reason why flight attendants tell us that in case of an emergency, we should secure our own oxygen mask before assisting others with theirs. Confidently recognizing that it is all right, even necessary, to have intentional times of refreshing can make a lifelong difference.

Third, we can learn to say “no” more often. Part of self-care is prioritizing. Giving ourselves permission to say “no,” or at least to say “later,” can bring about a more balanced and fulfilling life.

Finally, find something you really care about, and do it more often. Pick up a musical instrument, take up a new hobby, or collect seashells. Do something that brings rest and a smile to your face.

The process of intentional self-care and rest can be hard to learn. However, when we get in the habit of practicing this kind of care, we will find rest and refreshing in unexpected places.

This article originally ran on newspressnow.com.